I was slow to share that I had really jumped into essential oils as a business. I felt that little nagging voice of judgment creeping in. Judgement from myself, from others…But then I remembered the following piece of my history and it quieted EVERY self-conscious feeling I had.
My mind went to a time 11 years ago. I had started a wellness company. I’d been an esthetician for 8 years and a massage therapist for a few years also at that point. I was working with an herbalist. I felt sure of that path and loved everything I was working on. What an unbelievable feeling, right?
I had always wanted to run my own little shop, full of jars of herbs and tables for mixing. I found a cute little spot in a historic downtown area and took a leap of faith.
It was a beautiful space. It was a dream manifested. I was so, so proud.
I was young in both mind and marriage at the time. I hadn’t figured out how to stand up for my dreams. Self-doubt was planted in me like toxic seeds and I unknowingly allowed them to take root. Despite a lack of full support from my partner at that time, I kept going to pursue this dream.
I feel both heartsick and full of gratitude to share that my dad jumped right in with me on building the space that would be my truly beautiful little wellness shop. The historic rental I chose was in need of (major) handy work. He set about replacing door hinges, light fixtures, and locks.
Just like every apartment and house I’ve owned or rented, he was there to fix things at this space and make it feel like it was mine—like it was “home”. Without question or hesitation he set out to help. He had full faith in me.
If only I’d had it in myself.
In hindsight, I suppose things work out for a reason and I went on to other pursuits (which he also fully cheered me on in), but I can’t help but think what could’ve been if I’d only believed in myself as much as he did—particularly in the face of those who doubted me.
I was heartbroken to lock that space up for the final time about a year later.
I wrapped myself up in being busy with other things. I went back to work for the large natural skincare company I’d worked for before. I went back to graduate school eventually. I spent a lot of time getting back to that place in my soul that had dreamt so pure and honestly. It’s been a slow progression, but I see this moment in my life so clearly now. I see that girl and that compass guiding her.
Oils are a HUGE part of reawakening that part of my soul, my spirit, and my education I worked so passionately on all those years. It’s never left me. There are so many reasons why oils are important to me, but this is a part of my “why”.
I am prioritizing this lifestyle again with essential oils and I have to say it feels like coming home to a piece of myself.
I plan to share about oils here now and again as it is woven into many aspects of my life, but I’m also going to share just about oils here if you’re interested in more details.